Admit it: EMS stresses you out

A recent story in the Tampa Tribune, available here, talks about the "price" first responders pay for the stressors encountered on the job. My comment to my friend who posted it: "The reality of the job stressors in our environment is becoming more evident. I'm seeing more and more of this come out, and its about time. The public needs to understand that when you strip the uniform off, a human being remains." I caught some flak from another EMSer who read my reply and said "You need thicker skin or you'll never last." Let's see: 17 years as an EMT compared to his five..yeah, I think I'll last.

This isn't about developing "thicker skin." I'd like to think that all of us have a limit, a point where being human overcomes the "superhuman" attributes the general public likes to hang on our shoulders. We all wear different uniforms; some wear SCBA, others wear guns, we wear stethoscopes. But inside the uniform is a human being, someone who (hopefully) still retains the ability to feel raw human emotion in response to a an unnatural situation. We face it all the time, and I challenge you to stand up and say you have never, ever, been affected by at least one patient you've encountered over the course of your career. If you haven't been yet, you will be. Just wait and see.

Let's also not forget the other vital individuals in our daily lives who face similar, if not the same, stressors: our dispatchers and call takers. I have the unique opportunity to serve in both roles (field provider and dispatcher) on a regular basis, and I can attest to the genuine emotion felt when you see a job hit the terminal that you just don't want to put out: the Dad who OD'd on heroin while his kids napped. The dump truck rolled over on a car with a mother and infant inside. The child who's not breathing. I've dispatched each of those calls, each with the (somewhat) expected end results, and felt absolutely helpless as crews responded. There was nothing I could physically do to help, and hearing the emptiness in the crews' voices when they cleared the job filled me with a sadness I don't wish upon anyone.

It's part of our job, and something that we are trained to handle as responders; at least from a patient care & transport angle. What we aren't trained to do is harness our emotions, call time out, and take care of ourselves after such a traumatic experience. It's high time we, as providers and leaders of the field, take the reigns and start taking care of our own.

Fitness in EMS

Every once in a while, a trend starts regarding the fitness for duty of EMS providers, including a recent story of a fire department mandating fitness while on duty for their firefighters and paramedics. While I'm not on board with departments mandating fitness while on duty, I am on board with EMS providers needing to be held to a higher standard of physical fitness.

Those of you who know me personally are well aware I'm not a well-chiseled physical specimen. For years I've comprised my diet from the likes of McDonald's, Wendy's, and Burger King, with a few other specialties sprinkled in for bad measure. As a result, I've "suffered" the consequences of high blood pressure, high cholesterol, pre-diabetes, and an expansive waist line. The costs have also included being unable to keep up with my seven year old son or go kayaking with my wife...and much, much more.

In the past, I've been openly asked if I made EMS my career because "you're too fat for the fire service." As much as that statement hurt, part of it is true: I'd never qualify with a fire department. There's no "weigh" I'd make it through the rigors of fire training in full turnout, mask confidence, or maze courses. In fact, I will openly criticize any fire service that accepts morbidly obese members and permits them to participate in active firefighting activities, including pump operators and "exterior only" operations. It's not safe for anyone, least of all the people who are unhealthy.

Being overweight has caused me to question at times whether I can still do this job. All the aches and pains I experience on a daily basis are quite possibly related to 17 years of lifting and moving people...or are they? The continuous exhaustion is ridiculous. The desire to eat nothing but junk is damn near impossible to overcome some days.

Where am I going with this? I can't take the negativity, self-imposed or otherwise, anymore. I can't continue to be hypocritical when talking with patients about their life choices when I obviously haven't made the best decisions. I shouldn't have patients asking me if I'm okay after moving them down the stairs. And I certainly can't keep this up anymore. I'm sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.

Hi, my name's Jon, and I'm a morbidly obese EMT. I'm also a father, a husband, a son, a brother, and a human being that's just trying to live my life as long as I can. I'm making a change, starting today, to be healthier. If you're in a similar situation, better or worse, I encourage you to do the same. This is a big step for me, admitting I have a problem and openly sharing the details. I'll keep you up to date, and see how this all works out...I hope you'll follow me on this journey.